31 December 2010

2010

I started the year 2010 hoping it would be one of the best years of my life. Twelve months later, I'm not sure if it belongs to that category, but without a doubt, 2010 is one year I wouldn't soon forget.

The first few months started out smoothly. The year 2010 for me only had two defining moments:

Shortly a few weeks before turning 23, I had a ruptured appendix, which was probably my defining moment of the year. I'm grateful to come out of it alive, but the restraints and limitations of post surgery gave me depression. It was the most painful thing I ever went through- physically and emotionally. My depression even manifested in a hairloss. God.

So I turned 23 quietly, no joyful parties, just a simple celebration of being grateful. Anyway, what happened made me realize what matters, who matters, and what I deserve. Had I not been sick, I would've had a loud birthday party with loved ones, a weekend in Bohol after, and a search for the next job. But with that sad fate, my mood just wasn't festive. I could only be grateful.

And because depression only made my spirit weaker, I came back to work as soon as I could. Few weeks later, I was back with my old, carefree persona.

Before 2010 hit December, I quit my job at the Armed Forces. It was a plan long overdue. It was heartbreaking to leave because other than my real family, it was the best home I'd ever known after my school life. However, my fear of getting stuck is just bigger than my love for the place. I swear, though, I loved my job sincerely while it lasted. I once heard that you shouldn't limit yourself to what gives you happiness. I'd like to think my job loved me back. Love may be good, but cash is better. Hahahaha. Kidding.

Despite the blows that happened this year, on the whole, I think it's been a great one. I've learned what I needed to learn, realized what I should've realized; I acted by my decisions and stood by it. Faith kept me standing still. I met lots of new people, made new friends, and dropped a few people out of my life. I was more involved in the family, both nuclear and extended. Romance-wise, I've had "haba ng hair" and "giddy schoolgirl" moments. I have no other term, sorry! But did I fall in love? No. Did I have a clandestine affair? No comment. When will love ever be a priority?

For 2011, I've no resolutions, as I did not keep the ones for 2010. In the meantime, I'm ending 2010 feeling infinite. Happy New Year!

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